Tuesday, November 9, 2010
The Three P's
Pessimism. . . Perfectionism. . . Procrastination. . .
These are the 3 P's that have haunted me my entire life. If you've ever taken the DISC personality test you'll know what I'm talking about when I say I am as high C as you can get. I am a perfectionist to a fault and this perfectionism inevitably leads to procrastination. If I can't do it perfectly then I’ll put it off until I can. I think I used to live by the saying, why do today what you can put off until tomorrow? If someone were to say, "How’s that workin' for ya?" I'd have to say, "It's not!"
Procrastination is something I hate so I've worked on it for a LONG time. I feel I have a good handle on it now. I keep a schedule and a daily task list; sometimes I just can't get to something and that's okay. Rigidity can lead to negative self talk because once again I didn't accomplish all I set out to do. I've learned to have some flexibility. Flexibility can be like a double edge sword; too much can lead to procrastination, so healthy boundaries are good.
Perfectionism has always been required. If I couldn't do it perfectly then I shouldn't do it. My family & I have been learning a lot about grace this year. In fact, I would say this has been the year of grace for us. In learning about God's unmerited favor in our lives, it has allowed me to give myself some freedom. When I started this weight loss journey I didn't know what I was in for. It has tested my perfectionism time and time again. In the past if I failed at a weight loss program, even once, it was all over. The negative self talk would begin and the diet was out the window. Learning to give myself grace has been freeing. It is allowing me to keep going even after I mess up. It's not an excuse or a crutch but a freedom that has allowed me to come as far as I have.
The negative self talk or pessimism is another beast in itself. I have been doing this for 35 years. It's not something that is so easily changed. As I was contemplating this, God brought to my mind the picture He has given us of Heaven and what it will be like. It's a beautiful picture of grace, love and freedom. As life throws all kinds of things at me I can remember the hope I have in God and the life that I will have with Him after this one's over. The same thing can apply to many areas of life. If you can see the end and the hope at the end, then you can persevere through the tough stuff.
I have a vision of what it will be like to be at the finish line. It’s a picture of what a thin, healthy & happy Sandy looks like. When I think I just can't do this anymore I can pull that picture from my memory bank and keep pressing on. Getting Jason through school is another huge hurdle for us. We are trudging through because we have a vision of what life will be like when Jason has a job in his chosen career. Having a vision of what will come can help you persevere and keep your thoughts positive. It gives you HOPE.
I'm slowly replacing the 3 P's with 3 D's. . .
Determination, Discipline and Desire!!